Messy hair and an even messier heart is how I have come to you today. Bare faced, wearing my new lazy top that I got on sale a few days ago. “Unsteady” by X-Ambassadors were on a loop since four hours ago. The night is cold. I can feel the breeze from my window, sweeping into this house of mine – my own little world as I like to think of it. A few art pieces in frames that are still on the floor. I’ve been meaning to have them nailed properly on the wall, but haven’t gotten around it and I don’t know why. Books that I have read and re-read looked pretty on the shelf. Stacks of old books that nobody seems to want, but me. When my heart is broken and life gets heavy, there is nowhere I’d rather be but here – in my bed for two but just for me alone. Nothing can hurt me here. Life is simple in my little world. I feel safe and protected here in a way I can’t quite explain. I keep to myself. I spend more time alone – there are books and writing and endless cups of coffee and flowers and Netflix to keep me company. Maybe this is me growing up a tiny bit. Maybe it’s me finding home between my skin and bones and eventually, I will wind up being exactly what I need to be. The woman of my dreams.