The Upside-Down

personal diary

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Perhaps this is an overshare. But whatever I spill here are true to how I feel. I suffer terribly from menstrual bloating. I look at myself in the mirror and I feel disgusted. Once a month I go from my usual size 32/6 jeans to elastic waistbands only. And every month it humiliates me, zaps my confidence down to zero and I will crawl into that dark place where I will call the upside-down (if you know where I got that from, I love you!). I feel uncomfortable in all my clothes and will usually do everything I can to stay home, alone. I secretly shuddered the last time the man I’m dating tried to touch me. Leave me alone! My mood is just terrible, the worst. It is borderline satanic. It is epic hard work being a woman, our hormones are total despot, capable of altering not only our moods but our body shape too. All of us, as women deserve trophies for dealing with that all the time, our entire lives. I hate it when boys think we’re over reacting and use period as an excuse to lash out incessantly. Shh, I say. You know nothing. It’s a monthly personal hell. And you know nothing. So, Shhh.

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